Quote of the Day: “Whatever befalls the earth befalls the sons and daughters of the earth.  We did not weave the web of life; we are merely a strand in it.  Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves.” – Chief Seattle

I ❤ androgyny and I don’t know why.

My love of/fascination with androgyny started senior year of high school.  I still identified as bisexual at the time and I was genuinely attracted to a few men.  I noctice that I was attracted to men with long hair and women with short hair.  My attraction to men, obviously, has decreased to a very small handful – Johnny Depp, Josh Groban.  But I still find more androgynous women more attractive than outright feminine or outright masculine

I think that it does take a certain amount of bravery for a woman to be consciously androgynous.  For many, though, it’s more a matter of comfort than to make a statement.  Also, it’s rare!  I’m attracted to uniqueness and feminine girls are a dime a dozen (sorry, femmes!).  When I was girl-hunting (lol) over the summer, I wasn’t actively looking for butch girls.  Just a girl who would catch my interest, which takes much more than physicalness.  Most of them appear androgynous just because they’re comfortable that way.

You’re all probably well aware of my love of drag kings.  I don’t know why I’m such a fan, I just find most drag kings incredibly sexy! 

And then two bands I love are The Cliks and Boyskout.  Not only do they have great music, but they’re also pretty hot.  They’re all rather androgynous . . . ❤

It’s pretty easy for me to tell the gender of people dressed androgynously.  I dunno, it’s a gift lol!  As for myself, I’m, I guess, a slightly feminine androgyne.  Sometimes I’m more feminine, frolicking around campus in a frilly dress. 

I would love to do drag, but STAGE FRIGHT AAHHH

Quote of the Day: “In the skin of our fingers we can see the trail of the wind; it shows us where the wind blew when our ancestors were created.” – Navajo legend

My half-sister Leslie sent me a buttload of books for my b-day.  THANK YOU SO MUCH, LESLIE!!  Some of the books were “Autobiography of a Geisha” (next on my reading list, after “Harry Potter & The Deathly Hollows”), “The Invention of Painting in America”, a book about the development of the English language (having taken Latin, this fascinates me), and a pair of books about religion effecting the family and the family effecting religion.  She also sent me a catalog of more books from Columbia.  While perusing through and wanting all of them, one made me stop and stare at the page.

You probably know that I have a penchant for artificial intelligence.  I’ve created several pieces of art around it (http://beatles4eva.deviantart.com/art/Meditating-Robot-49844169, http://beatles4eva.deviantart.com/art/Artificial-Intelligence-1-63606138, http://beatles4eva.deviantart.com/art/Artificial-Intelligence-2-63605820, http://beatles4eva.deviantart.com/art/Machine-1-66041513, http://beatles4eva.deviantart.com/art/Machine-2-66767095) and I’ve blogged about it before.  I took that amazing computer science all because I wanted to learn about artificial intelligence.  I’ve read novels and short stories about it (yeay Isaac Asimov!!!!! <3) and I once told Anal Wart that, when I reincarnate, I’ll major in artificial intelligence psychology since that degree will probably widely exist then.

So in the Columbia catalogue, I found “Minds and Computers: An Introduction to the Philosophy of Artificial Intelligence” by Matt Carter.  My first thought was, “HOLY CRAP!!  It’s . . . me!!!”  What fascinates me about artificial intelligence is the idea of a human creating a human out of nonhuman materials, simulating the human mind – but not heart, which can’t be recreated – in a nonhuman being.  Not only do I want to study and know the entirely of that being’s experiences, but I also want to hear/read other ideas about what that means about humankind.  I think it’s a terrifying concept, but not terrifying like Freddie Kreuger.  Terrifying like how Mrs. Moore described the powerful Ganges River in E.M. Forster’s “A Passage to India”: “What’s a terrifying river . . . what a beautiful river!”

As to whether artificially intelligent machines such as the Terminator, the robot from “Short Circuit,” the characters out of Isaac Asimov’s books, or the robots from the movie “A.I.” could actually be made or not, it’s improbable.  But very simple, artificially intelligent machines have been made.  They can do very basic acts such as learn to walk and pick up objects by trial-and-error in ways that resemble toddlers so much it makes you rethink how toddlers function.  A very simple little robot face has become quite popular, smiling whenever action is going on around it and frowning during boring moments (more than just moving its elastic mouth: it moves its eyebrows, eyes, and cheekbones as well.  The computer scientists who created and programmed this little robot should receive the highest honors for such detailed and effective work). 

I want this book to know that I am not alone, that I am not the first to wonder what all this means outside a fictional setting.  I don’t plan on doing art therapy my whole life and, if studies of artificial intelligence like those found in this book are more widespread in a few decades, I won’t hesitate to make it my second career.  What, indeed, does this mean about and for us as human beings?  What constitutes a human mind and what right have we to create one out of manmade materials – also reducing the human mind to input and output?

Quote of the Day: “In her starry shade of dim and solitary loveliness, I learn the language of another world.” – George Gordon

Tuesday was Johnn Lennon’s birthday.  He would have turned 67. 

Happy Belated Birthday, John Lennon!

Today is Coming Out Day!

And today is Steph’s birthday!  Happy Birthday!!

Quote of the Day: “Eat your damned breakfast grits somewhere else, why don’t you?  There’s cow shit in the air!” – The Secret Lives of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd

Peacoat_2_by_beatles4eva.jpg Peacoat2 picture by kleokriesel

Even though I’ve been creating a lot of art rather rapidly, I’ve been rather insecure about it.  I have a gallery on deviantart.com (www.beatles4eva.deviantart.com.  The censored ones are mature and you need an account to see them) with almost all of my artwork.  Compared to the galleries of others to whom I’m subscribed, though, my pieces receive minimal views, comments, and subscriptions.  I thought I was imagining it, but all these great artists get 100+ views per piece and I usually get 8.

OM_Beatles_Checks_Swirls_by_beatles.jpg OMBeatles picture by kleokriesel

Yesterday after submitting two drawings, I perused a few galleries.  I came across one that immediately made me think, “Student artist.”  Her skills, techniques, and strengths were all just as good as other artists, but her compositions and subjects were like a large stamp, “STUDENT ARTIST!”  I fear that my gallery screams the same, only that skill is what’s lacking rather than composition.

Machine_2_by_beatles4eva.jpg Machine2 picture by kleokriesel

I’m very proud of many of my pieces . . . but recently I’ve been comparing the reactions to them to the reactions I see in other’s work – other artists my age with less art-related schooling (though I know that art takes more than school).

Machine_1_by_beatles4eva.jpg Machine1 picture by kleokriesel

I don’t know what’s missing, what needs to change.  Please offer whatever critique comes to mind!

mermaidyke.jpg mermaid picture by kleokriesel

Quote of the Day: “Where, unwilling dies the rose, Buds the new, another year.” – Dorothy Parker

Yesterday at work, I realized that the Presidential Primary Elections are coming up.  I did a brief Google search to find WI’s election date but couldn’t find one. I know that it’ll be in April at the latest.  That means, at most, 6 months.  SIX MONTHS UNTIL VOTING TIME PART 1 AAHHH!!!

It’s pretty scary.  I admit that I don’t know much about the Republicans, but I think that Giuliani has a pretty good chance.  And, of course, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton are the big names in the Democratic party.  I think that Barack has more of a chance than Hillary – firstly, I sadly get the idea that Americans would take a black male president over a white woman president and, secondly, Barack’s history is pretty clean compared to Hillary’s scandal-by-proxy.  Then again, people seem to be turned off by his lack of experience. 

Soon, it’ll be time for me to get back to work!  Telling people to vote, providing information about each candidate, and pushing people to vote for Barack.  It’s very tiring work that I enjoy.  However, the past elections have not turned out how I had pushing.  After each election, I’ve had to take a couple days off (or at least taken them easy) because all the work suddenly ended and ended sourly.  I think I’d still need to take a day of rest if any such election would go well.

I don’t think I’ll start working until next year, though.  Not only would it be difficult to get people’s attention about something 6 months away, but also I’m busy enough for now!  As much as I look forward to doing the work, I’m very scared of the results – and these are just the primaries!  After all the crap of Dubya, I wouldn’t mind having Guiliani as president.  Still not as good as it could be, but hella better than now!

Ok so now I’m more comfortable letting people in general know that
Voldemort has made contact with my half-sister, Leslie. Amongst my two
half-sisters and I, she has had the least bad relationship with him for
an amount of time. Also, he just doesn’t have Jen’s contact info – he
mentioned Jen in his first email but not in the second one. His first
email was almost pleading for forgiveness and a peaceful relationship.
I’m not mentioned; the way he phrased it, he seems to think I’m
“against” him while they’re “with” him. I’m neither, I’m AWAY FROM him.

this second email was just for Leslie since she’s the one who replied
to him. Jen wants nothing to do with him. Both emails ramble and ramble
and ramble, covering many points unrelated to anything. The Bible, his
childhood, Latin, history, and his time in the Coast Guard (I really
doubt he was in the Coast Guard. How often do they go to Greece and
Carthage?), are favorite topics of his. In his first email, he used
these topics to ask for forgiveness and support.

In this second
email, I guess he’s just making conversation and making some vague
point about how repeated mistakes should be watched out for? It starts
out that way, but then rambles about stuff that’s not related to
anything. One huge paragraph talks about gay men . . . with no real
point. He talks about how gay men should have realized that having sex
(he put “playing” and used rather graphic but scientifically correct
terminology) gave them AIDS in the early 80’s, about how two close
friends in the Coast Guard were dishonorably discharged, and about
different churches’ reactions to homosexuality. It’s really a pointless
paragraph that makes me wonder if he knows that I came out. I dunno, he
just wrote about gay men.

I’m glad that things between he and Leslie are very tentatively better now, but I’m still WEIRDED OUT!!!!

an extremely unrelated but awesome note, I had the frickin best dream
ever last night: I dreamed that the evil, liquidy terminator came back
in time and went on a killing rampage. While this was going on, Ashley
and I bought Halloween-themed pajamas and groceries from Target. This all took place in LA,
by the way. John Conor finally figured out a way to nail the evil
terminator to the road outside some bar. For eight days straight, he
was shooting the evil terminator. When he ran out of bullets at
midnight, the evil terminator exploded. It emitted a gas that turned
all the people it killed into zombies. Ashley and I reacted by going
from abandoned house to abandoned house, making out. The city officials
decided to lead the zombies to Santa Barbara (where I have never been)
to die off from heat and starvation. I suggested leading them through
the desert and the mountains/cliffs so they would get lost, starve,
fall, etc. They did so and it all worked out.